When it comes to habits, specifically bad ones, yours truly was blessed with the bad habit of nail biting. Let me tell you one thing, I have tried everything under the sun to fix this and I mean everything. But the thing about habits – especially bad ones – we don’t even realize that we’re doing them, sometimes we don’t even really think they’re bad in the first place which is another problem all in itself.
What I’ve started to realize is that these bad habits are just a way to cover up how we’re truly feeling. I don’t just bite my nails because I think it looks attractive (it’s actually disgusting), people don’t excessively drink 4 nights a week because they love being hungover, and your other friend doesn’t smoke cigarettes because they think that they’re good for them? Every single habit, whether it’s something major like smoking or something more minor like tapping their foot (I know we’ve all sat next to someone who does this and it’s way more annoying than you think) each habit, whether we realize it or not, is there to distract us from how we are truly feeling inside, it’s there to distract you from facing what’s actually going on and to block out your feelings while keep you pre-occupied with something else. I started catching myself every time I began to bite my nails, why do I do this?! I am so over having fugly hands. I know how dirty it is, they look like a 5 year old’s and it’s just overall not an attractive thing to do. I knew all of this yet continued to do it. I tried every single cream, polish, GLOVES ffs and nothing worked, it was frustrating as hell.
Shortly after I began meditating and getting more into this witchy vibe I started learning more about the importance of staying in the present moment, then something clicked. An extremely simple question popped in my head. Why tf do I bite my nails? And why have I never asked myself this before? Instead of getting to the root of my problem I was just trying to put a bandaid over the situation by fixing it externally with the creams/polish, etc. What I needed to do was figure out what triggered me to begin biting my nails, what was I feeling when I started doing it? What else could I do that was healthier when I started feeling this certain way? It all started with being conscious. I will start by saying everybody’s background is different. Nobody has the same past and everyone comes with their own struggles and have gone through different things, you may be trying to cover up something a lot more major than someone else and that’s okay too. The very first step is asking yourself why you’re doing this thing and doing it in a non-judgemental way. Don’t get angry at yourself just simply ask yourself why, and be honest. Why do you feel the need to constantly be high 24/7? Why do you feel the need to drink every time you feel awkward in a situation? Why do you bite your nails when you’re feeling anxious? Why do I automatically turn to over eating when I’m upset? There’s so many things that go on in our everyday life that we don’t even realize we’re doing to cover up our true, raw feelings.
Next time you find yourself mindlessly doing something you know may not be the best for you, just start being curious. Ask yourself why you happen to be doing this particular thing, and if it’s really what you want to be doing then have a hay day just make sure its coming out of a place of intention and not boredom or any other uncomfortable feeling that may come over you that you’re trying to ignore. The only way to get over things is to face them head on. My one lil tip – every time you catch yourself in the middle of your bad habit, because let’s be real we all catch ourselves and know what were doing, ask your self why you’re doing it, write that down and then come up with a few other things you could be doing instead. For me, biting my nails came out of a place of anxiety and stress. Now, when I’m feeling stressed out instead of turning to cannibalism I’ll do something I actually enjoy like going for a walk, reading my book, going on Pinterest, calling my mom or a friend, hot bath, there are sooo many things. I even booked myself a nice massage and a spin class after a long week to treat myself.
Moral of the story is not about me getting over a silly nail biting habit it’s all about being real with yourself and your feelings, stop hiding from them and embrace tf out of yourself. Start questioning things that you do – but make sure it’s not from a harsh place, be easy on yourself. You have the control to change absolutely anything you want about yourself. Simply taking 3 seconds to ask yourself why you’re doing certain things can be so powerful and just think – the first time you catch yourself and break that habit makes the next time so much easier! Have some patience too, I mean I’ve been biting my nails for 10 years and still working on it.
What do you guys do when you’re feeling anxious af? Ya girl is always looking for some tips n tricks. Make sure you comment. xo.