The amount of times I’ve been asked if I’m lonely or bored since I’ve been here is hilarious. One of the many reasons I decided to move was because I wanted to be alone, let’s even go with needed. Before you start feeling concerned for my mental health, let me explain. I absolutely adore all my friends, they know that and I know that. I also love a good night out (as you most likely already know) but I felt like I started becoming too dependant on others for making me happy. Everytime I was alone, I felt a little uncomfortable – always searching for the next thing to do. I wasn’t taking any time to myself to just relax and sit with my own thoughts, instead I was covering them up with constantly going out – to the point that I wasn’t even comfortable with being by myself – which in my books, is not ok. At the end of the day, you have yourself and that’s it…you can’t constantly keep relying on others to make you happy. So if you’re reading this and any of the above sounds familiar, where you hate being alone, always have to be doing something – I have one word for you. CHILL.
I’ll break it down a bit more. Being alone forces you to own up to your own bullshit. The reason you might not want to be alone is because you don’t like what you’re going to find. It was the biggest eye opener for me, realizing that the only person whose been stopping myself this whole time is me. And that the only way out of that hole is to face yourself head on (you know what I mean). You can have the most beautiful relationships with people, I mean duh – you need them to thrive. I’m not saying to go buy an android and move into the woods. But what if something happens? Things aren’t always going to stay the exact same, remember the only constant thing is change itself. What I’m getting at is start being comfortable with being alone. You don’t have to go move to South Korea alone, that’s on the far end of the spectrum but start doing things alone – going to a movie, a cafe, the market, a new workout class, anything. It’s one of the most refreshing things you can do for yourself. You start to depend more on yourself for things which helps you gain the confidence to maybe one day move to a new country alone (if you’re into that?) Another way to put it (which I’m sure you’ve seen as a quote all over instagram) is get comfortable with being uncomfortable. The moment you feel uncomfortable you should be freaking happy because that means you are finally out of your comfort zone. This is something I’m constantly working on, and will be my entire life so don’t get stressed out and cut out everyone in your life out because you think it’s going to make you better, it’s all about balance – just don’t forget about the most important person in your life aka YOU.
Also, how many times have I said the words comfort zone? Someone count and tell me.
I also want to clarify one thing – if you’re incredibly happy with your life right now and continue to be surrounded by people 24/7 by all means you do you, this is just my experience and what’s helped me so obvi I’m going to share. Ok cool.